The End of Work-Life Balance
And it's a good thing
Earlier this year, I published an article in Federal News Network arguing that work-life balance sets work up to disappoint us—and puts waayy too much pressure on our home lives. Instead, work-life integration, where personal and professional fulfillment work hand-in-hand, is actually what we need to connect more deeply with our work, our colleagues, and ourselves.
At this moment of transition, uncertainly and perhaps decisions about staying or leaving, I hope this article provides a reminder that caring about our work—versus Severance is a good thing—and a few ideas for how to make work-life integration more real amidst it all. Read on below and let me know what you think!
Beyond Balance: A Call for Work-Life Integration in the Federal Workplace for Suicide Prevention Month
By Alex Snider
As Suicide Prevention Month closes, we’re left with a sobering reality: for many, work isn’t just stressful, it heightens isolation and loneliness. The concept of work-life balance is partly to blame, by promoting an artificial separation between our personal and professional lives.
But we can do better, especially in mission-driven federal roles. By embracing work-life integration, where we see our professional and home lives as part of a connected whole, we can unlock the potential for our work to foster connection, purpose, and meaning.
“Balance” and Federal Doom Scrolling
The Apple TV show Severance offers a dark satire of work-life balance. In the show, employees undergo surgery to “sever” their work selves from their personal lives, creating two distinct identities—one for the grind of work and another for life at home. Spoiler: it doesn’t go well.
This exaggeration points to a truth: when we rigidly compartmentalize work and life, it can deepen dissatisfaction and disconnection in both areas. Suicide, along with other mental health challenges, is an undeniable issue within the federal workforce, and how we conceptualize work can make a meaningful difference.
The idea of balance pits work against our home life, leading us to fixate on the negative aspects of our jobs. Whether it’s difficult colleagues, shrinking budgets, or bureaucratic red tape, this “doom scrolling” reinforces our brain’s natural negativity bias and causes us to miss the positive aspects of work, like connections with colleagues or small victories.
Paying Attention to our Attention
Yet, the notion that work is something to endure, rather than treasure doesn't reflect the hopes of federal employees. The 2023 Federal Employee Viewpoint Survey reports that 92% of federal employees believe their work contributes to the common good, and 79% feel a sense of personal accomplishment. And Gen Z increasingly want to serve the public, too
As 18th century naturalist John Lubbock said, “What we see depends mainly on what we look for.” Decades of positive psychology research shows that shifting our focus to moments of connection can help us escape the impossible quest for balance. Instead of needing a “perfect” job we can remember that work, like everything else, comes with both challenges and rewards.
An Alternative: Integration
Work-life integration shifts the focus. For one, Federal employees serve in so many vital roles—whether it’s disaster relief, public safety, or global diplomacy— and integration lets us translate professional accomplishments to personal fulfillment. Time with family and weekends are important, but so are meaningful projects and connections with colleagues. Take for instance the Federal employees and partners behind the 24/7 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, who go home each day with the satisfaction of literally saving lives. It’s hard to imagine that this powerful mission and sense of accomplishment doesn’t make those employees better spouses, parents, and friends.
Integration also encourages flexibility with boundaries. Sometimes diving into work provides structure during personal chaos, while at other times, finishing tasks quickly frees up time for family. I’ve rescheduled vacations for key work trips but also taken last-minute leave for family. In today’s hybrid environment, I’ve found that tossing in a load of laundry between meetings can protect my weekends, while schedule sending a couple of emails over the weekend can help me feel prepared for the week ahead.
Finally, work-life integration challenges us not just to eliminate toxic bosses but to create tonic workplaces that actively heal and bring fulfillment .U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy emphasizes that colleagues are actually the key to combating burnout and isolation. Casual chats before meetings or coffee breaks, can foster connection and make work feel less like a solo struggle and more like a shared mission. Research shows that having even one friend at work can significantly improve job satisfaction and overall well being. A State Department friend, for example, regularly and gleefully hosts after-hours gatherings for visiting colleagues.
Integrating Work and Well-Being
I understand the appeal of rigid boundaries, especially in mission-driven environments. The urgency of the work can make it easy to overlook basic self-care. A survey for 4,500 Department of Commerce employees found 73% experienced burnout, citing no backup, excessive workload, and too many urgent deadlines.
Mission-driven work also carries the risk of over-engagement burnout, where an important work causes employees to overlook their own personal lives and those of their team members. A prior boss sometimes offered pizza to those staying late—a thoughtful gesture, but one that reinforced the idea that work should overshadow other sources of fulfillment.
But rigid boundaries aren’t the answer. Leaders can emphasize the meaning of the work while also reminding their teams that well-being and personal fulfillment are what enable long-term, sustained impact.
Practical Steps to Integration
Choosing integration over balance – or Severance! – is an ongoing practice. Here are a few strategies:
Reconnect with Purpose: On tough days, it’s easy to forget the bigger picture. Take time at staff meetings to reflect on the people you serve inside and outside of government. Keep a folder of success stories or kind words from others to remind yourself of the value you bring.
Practice Gratitude: Gratitude helps shift your focus to what went right. Each day, take a minute to thank a colleague and celebrate small wins, like a well-run meeting or minor bureaucratic success. These small gestures help reinforce a sense of achievement and connection.
Publicly Take breaks: Breaks are essential for personal renewal but also as an example for others. When leaders skip lunches, vacations, or time to recharge, especially during busy periods, it sets the tone for the team. By visibly prioritizing rest and personal commitments on your calendar and using schedule send, you demonstrate that well-being is as important as the work, encouraging a healthier, more balanced approach for everyone.
Embracing Work-Life Integration
I used to joke that my job was to write memos no one read. While this mindset kept me from disappointment, it also kept me from the joy of shaping important policy.
Suicide Prevention Month is reminder not to settle for work life balance. By embracing work-life integration, we create workplaces that foster connection and reduce loneliness. Finding joy and fulfillment in mission-driven work isn’t just possible—it’s essential for long-term well-being and impact.